So I read somewhere (or maybe I heard it) that most new years resolutions are discarded by February. I really was serious when I wrote, in my 2011 Resolutions post, that I am a goal oriented person. And I really do want to focus 'whole hog' on rebuilding, restoring, and deepening my family, my marriage, and myself. So on the first of the month, every month, I will revisit my goals and give myself a grade on how I'm progressing.
Most of you might want to skip this post, except for the one or two who actually care enough to read something as dry as a goals list (hi, Mom and Dad).
Goal #1: Focus on Scott.
What surprised me this month was how I had to redefine what 'focusing' on my husband actually means. I would have told you last year (and been right), that I was focusing on him by helping him achieve his (our) goals. However, this year I resolved to try to focus on restoring the 'oo-la-la' (if you nowudImean) back in our relationship. I have to admit that I kind of did this. I mean, poor Scott often gets the short end of the stick when it comes to me, the proverbial drippings in the pan after I've emotionally fed the kids all day. Here are some things I consciously did to try to focus on him as my husband and knight in shining armor:
1) I fixed him a cup of coffee every morning to hand him when he got out of the shower.
2) We went on a date out of town.
3) When I was feeling hormonal, I tried to keep telling myself that 'it' (whatever drama I was imagining at the time) was all in my head, and to therefore KEEP MY BIG MOUTH SHUT.
4) I tried to have the house clean, kids calm, and me out of my comfies and into some cute outfit when he got home from work every day. Sometimes this just didn't pan out (remember the froggy potty?).
5) I texted him cute little things throughout the day.
6) I reminded myself of what an amazingly wonderful guy he is, and looked at him through the eyes of an enthralled woman (this is very fun. I recommend it for any wife!)
Overall, I did OK, but have a lot of area for improvement.
I give myself a C.
Goal #2: Focus on Sophie and Xander.
I think I did a pretty good job on this. In fact, I think I over corrected, and become too nice, because my kids have started being very demanding, and I find myself immediately giving in! Also, although whining and disobedience have increased, timeouts have been few and far between this month. So I need to remember in February that 'focusing' on the kids doesn't mean 'catering' to them. Here are some things I did well:
1) Xander is potty trained!!! (well, except for overnight)
2) I started doing an hour of preschool work with Sophie during Xander's afternoon nap. This has been wonderful because Sophie craves both the intellectual stimulation, and the focused attention from Mommy. I'm pretty sure her love language is quality time.
3. I have made a conscious effort to not retreat into 'Danica land' when we're out and about, but instead to engage the kids - let Sophie weigh the produce at WalMart, point out the train to Xander, talk with them about the red and green traffic lights, find and read road signs with Sophie, sing silly songs while waiting in line.
On this goal, I give myself a B.
Goal #3: Focus on my family.
This one has been easy and fun! It mostly happens on the weekends, because that's when Scott is home with us. We have both resolved to work together on this one, and as I've said before, we make a great team! Here are some things we've done:
1) Took a hike in the mountains, where Xander played in the snow for the first time.
2) Worked together as a family to tear down the shed in our back yard. I know, this doesn't sound fun, but we made it into family time: the kids 'helped' with little hammers Scott gave them, and we all had a rollicking destructive time.
3) Washed the cars together. Sophie and Xander's first experience at this activity, too.
4) Took some family walks on the trail by our house. On these slow rambles we threw rocks, explored plant life, climbed down into a drainage culvert, and just talked.
Because of my studly husband's help, I give myself an A- on this one.
Goal #4: Focus on my writing.
I think this one is pretty obvious! I have been posting almost every other day. What I am discovering, is that the more I write, the more I am inspired in my daily life. It's a self perpetuating cycle. Some of the stuff is not my best work, but at least I'm doing it. I've also found a few blogs that inspire and motivate me - Lindsay over at Tiptoe Kisses, in particular. She blogs about the writing process, and if you like to write, I would highly recommend you go check her out.
Sometime this year I'd love to start work on a book, but am nowhere near that yet. Right now, it's just enough that I'm writing.
For that, I give myself a B.
Goal #5: Focus on my body.
This goal I have only started working on over the last two weeks. Here is how I have attempted to get healthy (aka loose the last 15 lbs):
1) I have gotten up to run about 4 mornings a week. I use the term 'run' loosely, as at this point it's a slow, easy jog. About a mile every day. But hey, it's a start, right?
2) I have cut back on my portions, and tried to eliminate most sweets and after 8 pm snacks. (notice the use of the word 'tried'.)
As a result, I have lost 3 lbs. 3 down, and 12 more to go. I could be a lot more consistent with my exercise, and more self-disciplined with my eating habits, so I give myself an overall B.